Birthdays – 2021

My parents were born seven years and one day apart – my father was born on January 23, 1914; and my mother was born on January 24, 1921. So yes – this weekend, my mother would have turned 100, and my father 107.

Many of you know my siblings are older than I am – by enough that my contemporaries in the family are more often my nieces and nephews than my brothers and sisters. As a result of this, it was really rare for our parents and all five children to be together. Side note – the first time that all five siblings slept under the same roof was in 2013.

Twenty years ago, to celebrate our mother’s 80th birthday, we all decided to trek out to Hawaii to have a massive birthday party. My mother was still an avid golfer, so we dubbed it the “Sweet Caroline Invitational”. I had even designed commemorative golf shirts for the occasion.

Concurrently. we also celebrated my dad’s 87th birthday – though none of us could have known it would be his last. I’m glad that he had the chance to see all of us together then – the family he’d raised, and even my nephew and his two children – four generations together is pretty special.

The day that I was leaving Hawaii to come home after this extended celebration – my dad called me over to him as he was sitting at his computer in the dining room. He picked up his gold-tone Shaffer ballpoint pen, pressed it into my hand, and said “take this”.

I didn’t understand then – I couldn’t have. But that was the last time I would ever share with my father. For twenty years now, that pen has had a place of honor – safely tucked away, and used only for Words I am truly moved to write by hand.

As I was reflecting on that week, and those birthdays that year, I went through some of the pictures. The one attached here shows my parents as my mother is opening one of her gifts, and my dad is looking down at the imprinted golf ball. But zoom in, and there in his shirt pocket is that gold Shaffer pen.

I think I’ll spend the rest of this weekend offline. It feels like it’s time to pick up the pen.

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